Sharing

How do you teach kids to share? I have been wondering this for a while because I don't want a child to need to be made to share his toys with another child. This means when asking a child would you like to share your toys with this other child, he needs to be allowed to say no. I, and the other child, need to accept that answer. However, I then might bring to his attention, when he is asking somebody else to share, that this is what it is like on the receiving end of the no, or that this was really friendly of the other child because now you can play together.

My difficulty then is if the child need never ask for another to share because he already has plenty. Today, one of the children came out with about 40 cars in his shirt and holding a car in his hand saying that his sister would not allow him this black car. His sister has about 4 cars. I debated for a little bit about sharing and then when he continued to argue, I made him give me all of his cars for the weekend. He will now need to rely on his brother and sister to lend him cars if he wants to play cars. He will get them back on Monday and hopefully this experience will help him to see other children's point of view when they ask for a car or two to play with.

One thing about needing to teach sharing is to help prevent possessiveness of toys and belongings. The children who don't share use the reasoning that it is mine and if you have it then I won't. I am not saying if there is only one of it they must give it up, or that they must hand over the extra special toy (though both of these actions demonstrate generosity in sharing), rather to foster the thought pattern of "If I have 2 and you have none, I can give you one and we can play together"

I too have some trouble sharing, I am more the type to not let people know that I have something I could share. I am not a good role model for the children in that respect.